Thursday, July 7, 2016

Married at first sight

Maybe you've heard it, seen it or read about it before: the episodes of the real-life program "Married at first sight" or MAFS as I will continue to call it. If you haven't, I'll explain briefly what it is:

It was a social experiment that aired on tv last year. Six brave singles got legally married to a complete stranger the first time they met. What? Yes, you read that correctly.

Four specialists – sexologist, Dr. Logan Levkoff; psychologist, Dr. Joseph Cilona; sociologist, Dr. Pepper Schwartz; and spiritual advisor, Greg Epstein – create what they believe are three perfect couples, based on scientific matchmaking. The couples will not meet until they walk down the aisle and see each other face-to-face, for the first time, at the altar. Over the course of several weeks, episodes capture each couple’s journey as they go from wedding, to honeymoon, to early nesting, to the daily struggle of working on their marriage. After several weeks together, each couple must make a decision: do they remain together or decide to divorce?

I was very much intrigued by this experiment. To me, it made sense. I do believe you need some sort of natural chemistry as well of course. And I know this was a television series so probably a lot was also put in scene or dramatised. But think about it: what if you always fall for the same (wrong) type of person? What if you get attracted to assholes who screw you over every time again? Wouldn't it be nice that someone with the same beliefs is matched to you?

Sidenote: I also believe that our relationships would be 'easier' if we all had a 4-headed team of specialists ready to talk about obstacles with us ;-)

One couple in particular sticked in my head from the 1st season: Jamie Otis en Doug Hehner. At first sight, you wouldn't match them. She was a pretty girl, but seemed like a bitch. He wasn't coverbook pretty, but wouldn't call him ugly either. Jamie got a panick attack right after the wedding because she did not feel attracted to Doug at all.


Jamie en Doug right after their wedding
They had 2 completely different backgrounds. He grew up in a nice middle-class, loving family with strong family bonds. She had a troubled childhood, bouncing around various trailer parks due to numerous evictions. Her mother was a drug addict and her stepfather was abusive and left them.

She didn't have much trust in others, and was very suspicious about Doug and his motives. But he, with his patience of an angel broke down her wall. Slowly, Jamie started falling for him.

Her ideal man is someone who is loyal, trustworthy, passionate and successful, who loves her and her siblings, and wants to conquer the world as partners. Doug is exactly that. He is looking for a spouse with a great sense of humor who is equally open, honest, loving, unselfish and goal-oriented.

Jamie is also exactly that, a raw diamond who just needed someone to make her shine. I love this couple so much! They worked so hard on their relationship and really overcame every obstacle that crossed their roads so far! It might take some effort and the road might seem rocky, but they did it! Look at where they are now:


They even announced that they are expecting a baby now!
So yes, I am a fan of MAFS. Are you?

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