Inner calm and peace of mind

Yesterday I spent the entire day on myself. I woke up around 9.30, had breakfast and cleaned my appartment thoroughly because my landlord would come to take pictures of it. I enjoyed the cleaning and liked making my appartment "picture perfect". When the landlord had passed by, I changed clothes, grabbed my stuff and walked to the city centre. First goal: the Pandora shop. I had set my mind on the "Princess ring" and went straight for my target. 3 min later I walked out the shop with this beauty on my ring finger: 

My Precious <3  IT'S SO PRETTYYY

It was already 3 pm now and since I skipped lunch I was pretty hungry by now, so I started browsing for food. I walked to The Century (which is my favourite food place in Hasselt) and found myself a nice place on the terrace, in the sun. Aahh, lovely. I checked the menu but didn't feel like ordering a full meal since it was already way past lunch time. I figured, let's just order a snack and so I went for the "moelleux au chocolat". As I sat there, waiting for my order I enjoyed. The beautiful day, the sun on my skin, the people buzzing around me. It was just me on the terrace, but I was peaceful. Calm. After about 10 min my moelleux came - and it wasn't moelleux on the inside, grr :'( . But ok. I still enjoyed every scoop of it. After my snack break, I continued my strolling through the city. Went to a few shops, bought some stuff, reached my steps goal (doubled it even!) and around 6 pm it was time to go home. Well first to the supermarket to get stuff to prepare dinner.

I decided a healthy mind should also have a healthy body so I would go for grilled eggplant and zucchini with cherry tomatoes, avocado and raw salmon. As I collected that stuff at the supermarket, again I noticed this feeling of inner calm and strength in me. I felt strong, complete and happy. I went home, prepared my dinner and sat down the table to eat it mindfully. Not watch television while eating, but just sit, eat and be. No distractions. And I liked it.

The bottom line for this post is that I really enjoyed spending a day 'on my own'. I didn't HAVE to do anything but COULD to everything. I went where I wanted to, when I wanted to and came home when I was tired. I struggled for a long time to do things on my own, because I never really learned to be. I always prefered company. Now that I think about it, I guess it also had to do with my insecurities and my need to feel save and loved. Doing things alone can be scary when you don't feel confident about yourself. I am 27 now and I can finally say: I am ok with myself and by myself.